Dear 2020

Dear Year 2020,

You are one tough year. You had brought so many challenges to each one of us. You are the reason why I am 9 months pregnant and yet I have to go to my doctor’s appointment by myself. You are the one who taught us that a piece of cloth on our face makes a difference. You made my kids learn from a screen. You made eating out almost impossible. You just turned our world upside down with Covid-19. Probably the word tough is not enough to describe what you really are.

But I want you to know that despite what you have brought to our lives. I remain grateful. This is actually the year of the Rat from the Chinese calendar and that is my year. The year that symbolizes wealth and a new beginning according to Google. It sounds crazy but I felt blessed in so many ways this year.

Let me explain. First, we are blessed with good health. I don’t think I have to say much on that, except being healthy during a pandemic is one of the best gift you can have. Then, came our baby boy named Tristan. He laughs a lot. and I enjoyed the time being stuck at home with him and my other two boys. It is also the time for self discovery. I have been so busy running around since the kids came but now that we are at home, I had the time to sit more, do calligraphy and draw. Instead of being bored I enrolled myself on Skillshare and studied Surface design which totally gave a new spark inside of me.

We have a job. Probably being a nurse is not the greatest during Covid-19 times but it is the most needed. Totally reminded me why I worked in healthcare and put my heart on it. Lastly, the opportunity to have a new home for our growing family came. Though we had challenges in the process plus post baby blues in between, we made it. I have to say that my husband also faced everything with strength and perseverance, seeing me lose it while juggling work, kids and getting our home. I am grateful for him. A lot of times I really felt helpless, all I can do is pray and tell myself that I have to be strong and sure enough God answered my prayers, in His own perfect time.

There are so many things in the world that I want to complain about but I decided to stop overthinking. I still get lonely when I can’t see family and friends freely and without fear. But, thank you. You have taught us so many things. Like being home with the family all time is tiring but at the same time you get to sit together more, talk more and laugh more. Being home also means more time to learn and develop new skills. Or simply being home to sit back and rest your mind. This is the time that I realized that I had so many dreams not only for my family but also for myself. I felt like I stopped dreaming since mommy duties took over my life but here I am, looking back during a hard time.

You are a tough year but thank you for teaching me to see beautiful things that I often taken for granted. Things will never be the same again but I know that all of us will get out of these challenges strong. I know there is more to come and each one of us have our own battles that we have to face, still I am looking forward to a new year where we can finally breathe and feel free. I will never forget you, year 2020.

With Love, Vanessa

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